Growing Yourself Up
8 weeks with Leif

Growing
Yourself Up

Journey to Center, a labyrinth and seated meditating figure, original artwork by Brooke Doughtry

You learned how to understand yourself.
Maybe you even learned how to “feel your feelings.”

Now learn how to actually change.

Growing Yourself Up is an 8-week practice in becoming a trustworthy parent to yourself:

The one who can listen to what's in your brain & body and turn it into healthy adult relationships.

Apply Now

8 weeks  ·  intimate group coaching with Leif Ariel  ·  begins january 19th, 2027

In a nutshell:

Is this for me?

Sound familiar?
  • You've done the therapy. You can name the pattern. You're still doing the pattern.
  • You know attachment theory backwards and forwards. You still spiral when they take three hours to text back.
  • You can have a hard conversation for anyone else on earth. Except for yourself.
  • You cried those “inner-child tears” four times. Why aren't they happy already?
And what you're actually longing for
  • To get to that mystical land of calm, stability, and relief you've heard comes from truly processing a big emotion.
  • To love someone without abandoning yourself to keep them.
  • To know what you need, ask for it clearly, and know what to do when the answer is no.
  • To trust yourself to have your own back, even when you're hurt, scared, rejected, or seriously activated.
“I know myself right now, I know what my needs are. And I know how to express that in a clear way… You held that container for me, encouraged me, and sat with me. Watched me fall apart, and come back together, and fall apart again. With complete and true love and compassion. Seeing from your soul, seeing me and my soul, and seeing my infinite potential. It's priceless.”
Anne Michael  ·  Realtor & TRE Practitioner
Why knowing isn't enough

What is Self-parenting?

Most of us have gotten really good at understanding ourselves. We know our attachment style. We can name where the wound came from. We can explain the pattern beautifully.

Then our partner tells us they “need space” and all that self-awareness goes down the drain.

Turns out understanding yourself and being with yourself are two different skills.

Eventually, someone inside you has to become the adult.

The one who can:

  • Hear the scared part without handing it the wheel.
  • Feel deep sadness, anger, or grief without getting swallowed by it.
  • Recognize a need and get it met without needing to fix or change another person.
  • Tolerate the uncertainty of adulthood without collapsing.

That's self-parenting. And it's a practice.

What actually changes

Self-parenting in action.

Same trigger. Two totally different people showing up.

Your partner wants space.

Before“Why are you pulling away? Are you mad at me?” Texts repeatedly, spirals, demands reassurance.
After“Ahh, this is bringing up my abandonment fear.” Tends the fear, then asks clearly: “Can we reconnect tonight?”

Someone is disappointed in you.

BeforeImmediately explains, apologizes, or changes your decision so they won't be upset.
AfterLets their disappointment exist. Checks inward: “Do I actually believe I did something wrong?” Responds from there.

You seriously mess something up.

Before“Jeeeez, what is wrong with me?” Shames yourself as a way to guarantee it won't happen again.
After“Yep, I screwed that up.” Feels the disappointment, repairs what needs repairing, learns, moves on.

You're lonely on a Friday night.

BeforeOpens Hinge, texts the ex, scrolls for three hours. Somebody make this feeling go away.
AfterRecognizes “I really want connection tonight,” feels the loneliness, then consciously chooses to call someone, make plans, or spend the evening alone.

You're furious with someone.

BeforeSuppresses it until it becomes resentment, passive aggression, an explosion, or a fantasy about cutting them off forever.
After“Whoa, my anger is telling me something isn't okay.” Feels it in the body, identifies the boundary, says what needs to be said.

You desperately want something.

BeforeTalks yourself out of it. “That's stupid, unrealistic, selfish,” or waits for someone else's permission.
After“Something in me really wants this.” Gets curious about the desire, takes it seriously, decides what to do with it.

Applications are open.

Apply Now
“I'm able to sit with myself in a way I never really believed I was capable of. There has been an inner peace and desire to continue to return to the self in that way. The ability I continue to choose to come back to the practice has stood out to me and strengthened my relationship with myself.”
Bailey D.  ·  Performance Coach
Leif leading a group session, seated in a candlelit circle
The practice

The Good Stuff

First

Understand who's actually running the show.

Week 1

Map of the Psyche

Week 2

Who Your Inner Child Really Is

Week 3

Defenses, Adaptations + Resistance

Then

Learn how to stay with yourself.

Week 4

Coming Into Contact With Yourself

Week 5

Identifying Needs + Boundaries

Week 6

Meeting Your Needs

Finally

Bring it into your life.

Week 7

The Actual Practice of Self-Parenting

Week 8

Having Healthy Adult Relationships

“Leif looks you in the eye with a passion, conviction, and energy that pulls you, like a magnetic force, toward your true self. I still feel this pull: a pull towards myself, a pull towards relationships with others, and a pull towards the things I want. I am forever grateful for the time and energy Leif poured into me.”
Maura  ·  Educator
Who am I?

About Leif

Leif Ariel outdoors, smiling

I'm Leif. I grew up in the ticky-tacky boxes of the Orange County suburbs, aka the place where how you look on the outside is all that matters…… so take that inside stuff and squish it down, girl!

Worked for a while. Until it didn't.

I've dedicated the last 10 years of my life to unraveling that “inside stuff”.

Here's the distillation of thousands of hours sitting with humans while they were struggling, resisting, f*cking up, crying, breathing, trying again, and changing.

May it help you turn towards yourself with curiosity, compassion, and leadership.

  • 25,000+ hours as a wilderness therapy guide working with clients in trauma and addiction recovery
  • 4 years and 1,000+ hours of training from the Barbara Brennan School of Healing
  • 3 years in private practice doing this work with hundreds of humans
  • Countless hours parenting myself in the exact way I'm teaching y'all
“Oh, this is who I came here to be. This is who's been here all along, and that human is really worth knowing. I feel like I have language for feelings and shifts that I didn't have before. I have agency.”
Eliza  ·  Life Coach
What's gonna happen

The Possibility

Eight weeks won't finish the work of being human.

What it can give you is a practice to return to when you're hurt, when you're furious, when someone disappoints you, when you've disappointed yourself, when you don't know what you need, when you desperately want something, when an old pattern is taking the wheel.

The goal isn't to stop being triggered or become a ‘perfect’ adult.

It's to become someone you trust.

Structure + investment

What you get.

  • 8 weekly live group coaching calls
  • Calls are 2 hours, Tuesdays 1–3pm MDT
  • Slack community access between calls
  • Lifetime access to the Growing Yourself Up curriculum
  • Weekly experiments designed to bring theory into practice
  • My meditation library
  • Recordings of every call
$1,400
Payment plans available  ·  10 seats only

Screening calls open mid-October, and there's already a waitlist for them.

I can't guarantee your experience of being you. But show up for the calls, do the experiments, get curious, be willing. And I bet you will experience yourself in a whole new way.

Apply Now

Why an application?

This is an intimate group doing real interpersonal work together. I want to know who's in the room.

Applying isn't a commitment to join. It's the first step in figuring out if Growing Yourself Up is the right fit for you.

You'll answer my questions, then we'll have a 20-minute call to talk it through, answer your questions, and go from there.

Before you apply

A few questions.

When does it start?+

We start Jan 19, 2027. Group calls are on Tuesdays 1–3pm MDT.

Why apply now if it starts in January?+

Because seats aren't reserved by start date, they're reserved by screening call, and those book out fast. The September cohort filled exactly that way, months in advance. My calendar opens for January-cohort calls in mid-October, and there's already a waitlist for those slots. Waiting until January will likely be too late.

Is this therapy?+

No. This is a psychoeducational group container, not clinical treatment. We draw on real developmental psychology, but you're not in a client-therapist relationship with me. If you're in active crisis or need clinical support, this isn't a replacement for that.

What if I miss a call?+

Every session is recorded, so you won't lose the material. That said, the live container, the actual experience of doing this alongside other people in real time, is a big part of what works, so it's worth treating the calls as non-negotiable where you can.

Do I need experience with this kind of work already?+

No. Some people arrive having done years of therapy and feeling stuck. Others are just starting to look at this stuff. The curriculum builds from the ground up, week one assumes nothing.

How is this different from your 1:1 work?+

This is a structured 8-week curriculum in a small group, with weekly live calls, written material, and experiments between sessions. 1:1 work is longer-form and built entirely around you. If you're not sure which fits, apply and we'll figure it out together.

Is there a payment plan?+

Yes, payment plans are available. We'll work together to pick the plan that fits your financial needs.

Ready to practice?

Apply Now

8 weeks  ·  begins january 19th, 2027  ·  10 seats only